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I Can't Stand My Girlfriend's Dog
Monday May 29, 2006.
By econfidant
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I'm dating a girl who has a dog I can't stand. I'd love to ask her to move in with me, but I don't want Snowflake anywhere near me or my stuff. Can I ask her to give him up?
Before Snowflake starts packing his mini-sweaters, take some time to figure out how to handle both the moving-in and the disliked doggie. Communicate with your girlfriend. Tell her how you feel about her, and that you'd like to take things to the next level by living together. If she feels the same way, you must confess your concerns about sharing a home with Snowflake. I doubt your girlfriend will be surprised, but it is important that you are specific about your concerns. Once it is out in the open, work together to find a solution that both of you can live with. Compromise is a big part of any relationship, and you will most likely have to compromise when it comes to her dog. Yes, you can ask her to give up Snowflake, but that doesn't mean she won't get angry at you for asking, or that she'll agree. Perhaps she'll be so excited that you want to take the next step in the relationship she'll be willing to find Snowflake a good home. Maybe a friend or family member will take the dog so that she can still see Snowflake often. Regardless, you must discuss the dog, and come up with a solution together. Try and focus on specifics, so your girlfriend can relate. Maybe Snowflake has some behavioral problems, and you're worried he will chew up your stuff. If Snowflake does end up in your place, explain that there will have to be some ground rules. Maybe create some "dog-free zones" or agree that Snowflake will not be allowed in the bedroom. Does Snowflake need more dog training to rid him of bad habits? Try to be sensitive so your girlfriend doesn't feel like you're attacking her disciplinary skills. If you love your girlfriend and you really want to live together, consider compromising if she refuses to give up Snowflake.
Good luck, Have a question about your one-true-love or latest fling that you just can't share with your friends? Rachel Begelman and Sarna Lee founded econfidant.com to give you the smart, one-on-one advice you need. You can ask that single pressing question or sign up to ask unlimited questions. Read more about econfidant. Have a question for econfidant.com? Ask it here...they'll answer one question from a Centerstage reader each week.
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